On fruits that shouldn't have seeds in them

A sweet bite of grape,
rudely interrupted—CRUNCH!
Seeds make Lisas cry ;_;

On Database Normalization

They say it is good
the normalized database,
but my eyes bleed JOINs.

On DNS

named has been fooled.
Randomized source ports are key;
DJB was right.

Python sends too slow;
C raw sockets should work--Drat:
Metasploit beat me.

On CRC

Database coders,
note: no schema should have fields
named CRC.

Seriously, guys? 1985 called, they want their checksum back. Putting a checksum of a field in the same table and then indexing said checksum...I lack words for how "you're doing it wrong" this is.

On copyrights

Glorious hours
of words and tiles - gone for good.
Suck it, Hasboro.

I loaded up my scrabulous on facebook this morning to discover that Hasboro has finally managed to shut them down. Fuckers. I'm sooo not interested in trying out the Hasboro-built equivalent... and I'm super upset about losing all my old game records :( Rawr.

On DC Rudeness

Wish I were a bitch –
I would have kicked that hussy
Who shoved on the train.

Or perhaps snidely
remark, “thanks, buddy!” when jerks
fail to hold the door.

My two biggest metro annoyances: stupid little bints who nearly knock you over as they push to get on the train in front of you, and people who can’t be bothered to hold the door for people behind them when leaving the station. Probably a little common courtesy would kill them.

Seriously, guys?
Leaving ALL the coffee pots
Empty incites rage.

People in the DC office need to learn some freaking kitchen matters, yo.

On Crashing Browsers

It’s not in the least
necessary to crash out
when closing, g-chat.

Every time I use g-chat through my gmail window in firefox and pop someone’s conversation out, firefox crashes when I try to close the gchat window. How annoying. Of course, if Pidgin would just quit fucking around and actually connect to Gchat here, I wouldn’t be having to use the stupid web interface, ANYway ><