On ridiculous footwear

Slow walkin' women:
don't wanna stare at your ass,
get out my damn way!

The problem? Your shoes!
Heels that don't hinder your gait?
Unreasonable!

On girl-shoes

Have I bitched about
this before? It's possible:
my brain's like a sieve.

Oh, well: Women's Shoes...
I try you on in the store
and you're so comfy!

Then when worn to work
you make my tootsies cry out,
"Blisters: do not want!"