On Days of the Week

Why call it hump day?
The median of the week -
must in sound vulgar?

Just a grump, I guess;
unjustified linguistic
blackboard fingernails.

Something about calling Wednesday "hump day" just... rubs me wrong. Makes me go "Yick! WTF!?" Go figure. On the other hand, going to label this post and seeing "space sheep" in the list of labels: high-larious!

Standards, or a lack thereof

Inform reception
should standards not be up to
your expectations.

So reads a little sign in each of the bathroom stalls here. I had to tweak it into haiku form, but the operative words are the same - "standards up to expectations." I think the word they're looking for is "conditions" rather than "standards" unless they want to imply that any time the bathroom gets a little disheveled, they have no standards.

Connotations are
important when writing signs.
Grammar standards, please!